Odyssey Counseling & Therapy

Identity exploration without a preconceived agenda.

If you're coming to counseling to clarify questions about your sexual orientation, then no doubt you're feeling pretty nervous about the whole idea.  Rest assured of my view that all answers about identity ultimately come from within.  My role as a therapist is to ask helpful questions, but to leave the answering to you.  Like other issues of identity, the process is not simple or linear, and if I were to challenge anything, it would be the pressure people often feel to come up with the answers quickly.  Along similar lines, the process of reaching some definition around lesbian, gay, or bisexual identity and then taking the next step of sharing it with others ("coming out") is intricate and extensive.  As your therapist, I honor your process and the answers you find.

Survivors of ex-gay interventions: gay counseling & recovery from "reparative therapy" and ex-gay ministries.

Sexual conversion therapy (also known as "reparative therapy"), operates from stereotypes and the assumption that lesbian, gay, or bisexual feelings are rooted in pathology or developmental deficits.  The underlying goal in this type of counseling exists before you ever walk through the door: change your sexual orientation.  If you've been through this process, it was probably your goal, too. 

On one hand, it was probably comforting to talk to others who shared your feelings.  For the first time, you may have felt like you weren't alone in dealing with the issues.  On the other hand, the assumptions that something is wrong with you (since you don't quite fit societal expectations) were likely left unchallenged.  If you have walked away from the experience with a sense of confusion, guilt, rejection, or that ends are loose and business is unfinished, you're not alone. 

Recovery involves talking about the experience, how you're feeling about yourself now, and slowing down enough to explore the societal context in which you relate to yourself and others.  We'll approach your experience with curiosity and questions, leaving their answers in your hands, not mine.

The gender & sex lens: "male" and "female" is an over-simplification.

"The political is personal, and the personal is political."  This addage could not be more apparent than when it comes to gender and sex.  When it all boils down, LGBTQ issues would not be a hot topic if society were progressive enough to open the door to equal status and opportunity for women. Stereotypical "male" qualities tend to be given special status, while qualities more stereotypically "female" usually take on some supportive role, and the emphasis on not mixing the two can be intense.  

Transgender and intersex people are on the frontline in challenging the myth of only two genders and only two sexes.  But most people would prefer to keep their personal lives - well - personal.  As a transgender or intersex person, you may find yourself continually pulled into a political role (or compelled into uncomfortable silence), when you may just simply want your internal experience and your external and physical experiences to line up. Safe spaces like therapy for personal and full self-expression, along with an embracing community, can be helpful as you pursue all of your life goals.

Affirmative counseling & therapy.  

Affirmative therapy doesn't necessarily mean that all discussions must come around to a focus on Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, or other sexual or gender identity (LGBTQ) issues.  In fact, the opposite is often true.   LGBTQ people seek help in addressing the same life issues that heterosexuals do - depression, anxiety, life transitions, career decisions, parenting children, relationship struggles, addictions, and so on.  At times, LGBTQ identity will provide merely the informative background in our sessions, while at other times it can take center stage.

Questions? 

Call or e-mail Mike to talk more. phone (503) 740-0573